Jamming right now. So hard.

Time to sit back and groooooove baby.

Notes to the week

Dear Justice,

Your storefront is giving people seizures.  I'm over your lifestyle.  Every nightmare that I ever had in middle school is rooted in your pop-tastic threads and neons.  Never you mind.

Dear Kickball Teammate,

Last night you invited everyone to come out to the 'Ladies' Night' at your new spa...the spa that you and your husband just bought.  Right. Further news?  I made rent this month.  MAZEL.

Dear Twenty-somethings,

Your Quarter Life crisis, perfected.  Please click here and know that you are eerily understood [courtesy of Buzzfeed].  Now shut up and go do something.

Dear Gay Marriage shit going on in the Supreme Court,

There are far too many people on my Twitter feed quoting decisions, and having opinions, and using atrocious grammar. 

So...what. Congrats, gays, on now getting Social Security benefits that won't even be around by then?

I propose a marriage gauntlet for happily engaged couples.  It'll be like Survivor and The Amazing Race - you can't figure out how to ride a camel across the Amazon with your future spouse, then you don't deserve to share a last name.  Case closed.

 Dear Everyone,

Have I told you about Henry Cavill?  Of course I have.  I'm just reminding you....hayhayhayyy.

 

...fantastic.

 

But, are they really unintentional? Tuesday ...for the win.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. Absolutely incredible.

Unintentionally Sexual Sports Pics

I'm just wondering who's been stalking the Google for these.

My personal favorite...

Skeet, skeet - git it, git it.

Bitches love Teddy Grahams.

OM NOM NOM.  The granimal-animal.  If you haven't indulged lately, then definitely hit these up.

My co-worker Joe has been on the TG kick this morning.  And I don't hate it.  Joe says: Give that bitch a Teddy Graham.  Bitches love Teddy Grahams.

He's right.  Today, Joe wins.

Get ready for the most awkward 'happy-birthday-to-myself' post ever.

I can't even deal.

Tranlsation:  "I sleep in my mom's nightgown and I just jizzed in my pants. Who's coming over to play ring toss tonight???"

Letters to Wednesday.

[iwastesomuchtime.com]

Today's letters are actually someecards. May you laugh so hard that you cry...or shart:

I noticed.

Perfection.

Aren't we all?

HAHA. Sometimes.

Hot tub cinemas...and other things that 'seemed like a good idea at the time'

This hot tub cinema thing. It vexes me.

We went to see Super-Man: Man of Steel on Sunday as a family.  Family...read: my parents, brother, sister, grandmother, grandmother's ailing friend.  Okay.  So we went to the renovated theater that's jacked up with freaking recliner seats.  Even the carpet still smells new!  It's fantastic.  And I got to put my feet up without cramping (har. har.)

Now imagine 7 grown adults of that ...diversity...piled into a hot tub. Together.

Right? Totally West Virginia. Makes you shift uncomfortably in your chair.

And you've seen the new Super-Man actor guy?  Maiiii gawwwwd.

It was hard enough trying not to dry hump the armrest.  Case in point.  Hot tub cinema = never.

Hairy-leg anti-pervert stockings for women? Also = NEVER. Nope. Misery. I'll take the pervert.